2021

2021 was the hardest year of my life. This fourth book was the hardest book to write. I had to face things with which I had yet to come to terms. I had to face myself and my past. This book continues the journey, and it sets up what is yet to come in the fifth, and final book in the series.

2021 had been a series of incremental challenges for Ensign, each predicament somehow lower than the situation before it. Ensign kept wondering what else could go wrong. He made it through each decline, just to be faced with a harder challenge. He learned he was strong enough to continue, but he wasn't sure he wanted to continue.

All sides of the country and everywhere in between, 2021 involved so much travel. The journey through the country shaped Ensign on the journey through his mind.

"Everything led him to that morning; the morning which marked the beginning of a nightmare at Ensign's true rock bottom. He knew he was in it. His mind, his Hell; it was Ensign's entire world. There was no line where the inner turmoil ended, and the outside chaos began. Ensign's mind, and his world around him; it was all one big mess."